My child is going to kindergarten – what should we do to make this step a success?

There is still some time until kindergarten starts in August, so use it to ensure you come up with the perfect way to combine family and work in this new phase as well as prepare your child for this step. Perhaps this is exactly the time when you too would like to return to work? Find out from your local authorities about the opening times of the kindergarten and, if need be, extracurricular childcare. Then check what you and your family might need in terms of childcare and how this could be organised:

Checking the possibilities of extrafamilial childcare

• What possibilities are on offer from the local authority? What are the possibilities (daycare centre, childminder, nursery) and what do they cost?
• Grandparents: perhaps they did not used to want to take on specific days as far as childcare was concerned, but they might be willing to do so now with an older child? It’s worth asking.
• Neighbours: maybe you could make reciprocal childcare arrangements with the neighbours? At kindergarten age, the amount of childcare required is less: having lunch together or looking after a child from 3.30 p.m. – 6 p.m. is simpler than having to look after a child all day.
• A nanny / au pair might now also be an option?
• Reorganise your working hours. Maybe you or your partner could investigate spreading your working hours over several days so you can cover some of the care together? Maybe it’s possible to save up holiday to cover the school holidays?

It’s also worth finding out what care programmes are on offer locally during the holidays. There are around 13 weeks of school holidays to cover. Maybe you could check what the possibilities are for this period when you are already busy reorganising childcare.

Most children really look forward to starting kindergarten. But there are, of course, those who are more reserved when it comes to changes. You can give your child support before they start kindergarten by specifically promoting their independence and also strengthening their self-confidence because to complement the basic confidence gained in the toddler phase, your child now needs to build up self-confidence. Children have to find out that they can make a difference to be able to slowly detach themselves from their parents. In the first years of their life, they developed roots; but now it is slowly time for them to grow wings.

Encouraging your child’s independence

• Give your child time and let him/her try things out for themselves: we often tend to put jackets and shoes on our children ourselves because it’s faster. But make sure you give your child the time and confidence to be able to do it themselves and let them practise.
• Take ideas and suggestions your child has seriously: sometimes we immediately have the answer as to why an idea won’t work on the tip of our tongues. But instead of answering, you can ask your child about the specifics of their idea.
• Let your child make their own experiences and make their own decisions: clothes. Yes, always a subject of great discussion. Surely it’s possible to let the children try things out for themselves? Surely you can let them choose which colours go well with others and think about what kind of shoes would suit the weather? Just grin and bear it ;-)
• Trust your child – they are, after all, nearly ready for kindergarten: at that age, children love helping in the kitchen. Show your child how to use a knife properly and let them help to set the table or, depending on where you live, let them run an errand for you. These are all things that are possible at that age.
• Children are also very good at solving conflicts themselves: as long as an argument is not too physical or psychologically problematic, you can let a child fight with another child without intervening directly. It is better to talk to the child afterwards about how they feel and what other behavioural options might have been helpful.

Promoting self-confidence

• Talk to your child about your and their feelings: in this way, you promote their (self-)awareness, which is the basis of healthy self-confidence.
• Allow the child to experience defeat, frustration and failure: talk about each of these with your child, name the feelings and show the child how to deal with the latter. Encourage them to try again.
• Praise and criticise behaviour – but never the child or their character! You can change your behaviour, but you can’t change a person or their character. “You’ve drawn a lovely picture” instead of “Wow, you’re a real artist” …
• Encourage your child to try out new things: doing new things strengthens courage and self-confidence. You can always offer a little support if things don’t immediately work out. But try not to help from the beginning. Only intervene if the child is having trouble.

Children who can do lots of things independently in everyday life and have already developed a certain frustration threshold will have an easier time of it when they start kindergarten. A kindergarten teacher is normally responsible for anywhere between 20 and 25 kindergarten children by themselves. This situation requires children to have patience and a certain degree of independence.
Find out here in an article in German from Swissmom what your child should be able to do by the time they start kindergarten.

To ensure things get off to a smooth start, make sure you plan plenty of time for kindergarten in the morning and remember that your child may well need accompanying to kindergarten and back home again in the first few weeks.

If you are unsure about whether your child is really ready for kindergarten or you have other questions, get in touch with the kindergarten or have a word with your paediatrician or family doctor. The authorities are often willing to offer a bit of leeway and will be happy to help you with any questions you may have. Furthermore this wireltern article (in German) also provides tips and some background in German to the whole subject of whether your child is ready for kindergarten.

We hope everyone, big and small, has lots of fun. Be proud of taking the next major milestone!